...and who's The Boss of your career?
In 16 years of working with people to help them get better results from their careers and business, there’s one thing that I’ve noticed which makes the biggest difference.
It’s not any one specific practical skill like marketing or producing a CV (although of course they do make a difference). The biggest difference to your success is in your mindset or attitude: and probably the biggest thing in that area is what we in the coaching world call “being at cause”. So, what does that mean?
Well, it means that you are taking responsibility for everything in your life. Notice the word is “responsibility”, not “blame”. This is an important distinction.
The opposite of being At Cause is being At Effect. That’s when you blame other people, things or circumstances for why you can’t do something or for how you feel. For example,
- You make me feel so angry
- I can’t progress in my job because the company won’t train me
- Business is really tough because of the economic situation
All the while you’re blaming someone or something else for your circumstances, you can’t get anything better until they change. However, if you take responsibility for yourself, you’ll be asking good questions that will give you options and opportunities to do what you want:
- "How else could I choose to feel" (instead of angry)? Or better, “what shall I choose to feel now”
- "How else could I get the training I need?" "How else could I progress in my job or reach my career goals?"
- "What are the opportunities that this economic situation might throw up for me?" "How can I create a business advantage in this economy?". Good current example: whatever you thought of Brexit, it's your choice whether to moan or look for the opportunities.
What you believe about something creates your experience, so this month just try being “At Cause”. A good initial question when you notice yourself being “at effect” or focussing on the negatives of a situation is “what would I rather have than this?”
Until next month, be happy and be successful and be responsible for creating the outcomes you want.
Dave
PS. In addition to the quote of the month below, this from Denis Waitley is lovely too:
"The greatest gifts you can give your children are the roots of responsibility and the wings of independence"
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